Vampire Dog: Canine Stand-Up

Talking dogs are nothing new in film. In fact, some of the most notable actors of all time have done voice work for animals in children's films: Don Ameche in Homeward Bound, John Travolta in Bolt and Tim Allen in the Shaggy Dog to name a few. But I was not prepared to hear the voice of one of the best comedians currently working during my latest venture into the "Boy Meets Dog" genre of family schlock. On the surface, Norm MacDonald is a strange choice as the canine lead for last year's Vampire Dog, but there is a semblance of hope that his voice and comedic sensibilities will bring a quality to a genre that has continually produced awful films.


Well, let me be blunt and say that Norm couldn't save this movie, but not for a lack of effort, or rather, lack of the beloved Norm MacDonald charm. His voice work in this film contains all the understated and dry expressions of wit that fans of his stand-up and late-night performances have loved for years. In his portrayal of Fang, a 600-year-old vampire that has been transformed into a dog, he makes no effort to create an accent or enunciate in a way we would expect a Transylvanian canine to. In fact, Fang the Vampire Dog IS Norm MacDonald. Yes, he likes to eat red jelly (because children's cinema has sunk so low we now need euphemisms for blood.) And yes, he burns in the sunlight, but otherwise this dog is complete Norm, and the movie is much more enjoyable for it.

The Internet is full of ridiculous whining and questioning about why Norm chose to take this role. The question fundamentally misunderstands his role as a comedian in the world of entertainment. Ultimately, his job is to make people laugh, and that is something he accomplished as a dry-witted jelly-eating terrier. While Vampire Dog is overall a horrible and cliched film, Norm's voice made it better. I haven't managed to hear his work in 2012's The Outback, or any of his other previous voice work  but I look forward to hear him do more voice acting in the future.